
A case of two opposing world views.
Have you ever been so misunderstood that you feel like you are being transported to another reality? You are shocked at the meaning that another human being can spin from a simple uncomplicated interaction. That is the reality of some of the workplace conflicts you might encounter.
I used to work closely with a person who had the amazing capacity to weave the worst meanings from people’s interactions with her. This I infer came from her unhealed trauma of rejection. She read rejection from any interaction from anyone who did not overtly demonstrate that they liked her. As a result she never left any job on a good note and rarely kept a job for longer than a year.
Of course she had a great relationship with me – the queen of people pleasing then. In retrospect I realise that the success of our relationship was due to my constant vigilance around her. I was careful to anticipate what could set her off and avoid saying or doing anything of that nature. I never understood until I interacted with healthy people on a consistent basis how exhausting those mental gymnastics were.
What I have realised that each person brings their worldview into any interaction. When those align with ours we call that common sense. Sometimes they don’t and our work is to empathise with but not necessarily buy into that worldview, if it’s not in alignment to our values. While respecting that this view point is valid for that person at least.
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Are you a Black Woman in the Workplace who feels called to the next level of leadership, income and impact?
My name is Busisiwe Hlatswayo and I coach Black women to position themselves for leadership, navigate race and gender bias and be effective leaders in the workplace and the market place
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